oh, this is adorable

I liked this site better when it was Sadly, No!
But, when people who don't cite sources write stuff that pretends to be mainstream, reality tends to kick you in the ass for your hubris.

protip: if you're going to be a right wing douchebag on the internet, please remember that we all have google in another tab at this point.

FUCK YES.

how the fuck did I miss this?
Alan Motherfucking Turing!

Celebrate by doing some math you bastards, get to work on P vs NP or A.I. or something.

Public service announcement

This comes courtesy of Kaoklai Kaennorsing, Muay Thai, and your local hospital's triage team.
Do not, repeat: DO NOT, let little asian dudes kick you in the head, it will turn you into a motherfucking zombie.

I don't know why I haven't been killed yet either.

Or: Why there is no measurable difference between me in a good mood vs. me in a shitty mood.

Or: Things you really, really shouldn't say / do in bed.

To protect the guilty, I am not putting names up for any of this. Was reminded this weekend of my lack of a 'filter' to keep me from saying horrible shit that I personally find amusing, regardless of circumstance, in this case; mid/post coital.


"Are you ticklish?"
'yes?'
"Neat! So's your sister!"

"Be colder. Move less."

"Happy birthday, Grandma!"

"Chad, you're awesome!"

"That'll teach you to say you have standards in public."

"Ha Ha!", followed by giggling, clapping and pointing at my nether regions.

"Sorry about the herpes."

"Well, that was degrading for everyone involved. 10 minutes?"

"You know [name redacted] is going to commit suicide over this right? Because I'm not sure I can avoid telling them. And touching myself while doing so."

"My new nickname for you is 'Scott's sock drawer'"

Goddammit

I swear, this isn't the "I drink like a fucking maniac, ha ha" blog.
But.

Well. Science.

It's my excuse, and I'm sticking with it

I drink, because I'm obviously a fucking genius.

surprising exactly no one

I am a fan of Nirvana. And have most of the albums from every artist in the top 8 on that poll.

Fuck it, in the words of a softer world, 'we're all going to die. i intend to deserve it.'